top of page

The Four Commitments

Updated: Dec 8, 2022

The four guiding principles work magic when they become commitments. Taking on these commitments, you transform from a mediocre, haphazard driver into an excellent one. Believe me, on this journey, you want to be well-equipped; it can be a bumpy road.


Knowing Yourself

The aim of life is self-development. To realize one’s nature perfectly – that is what each of us is here for.

— Oscar Wilde

How does one get to know oneself? Just like one gets to know anything. The secret is heartfelt observation—observation accompanied by patience, compassionate witnessing, listening without judgment, becoming aware, noticing, and being present. To know ourselves, we must cultivate loving mindfulness toward ourselves. In short, we must learn to become emotionally intimate with ourselves.

What about you? Do you take the time on a daily basis to sit with yourself? Do you ask yourself: What is going on with me today? How am I feeling? What do I need or want? How was my day? What moved me or inspired me? What feels most important to me today? And so on.

This kind of deep listening helps you touch your pains and vulnerabilities with kindness, and it also helps you to cultivate your joys. Attentive listening is profoundly healing. From childhood on, we accumulate negative attitudes, interpretations, expectations, and behavioral patterns that diminish our self-esteem, our ability to actualize ourselves, and our sense of joy.


Attending to Yourself

Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.

— August Wilson

The second commitment springs out of the first one. As you begin to listen and get to know yourself, you embark on the sacred, unending, and at times the daunting task of attending to yourself. Taking care of yourself means being responsible for your total well-being. The food you eat, the thoughts and feelings you feed yourself with, your physical activities, your rest time, your sleep time, the kind of work you do, the way you go about doing your work, your relationships, your communications, your playtime, your pleasures and joys, your inner growth, your education, your creativity, your goals … and the list goes on.

No wonder we get overwhelmed by all of that. But who else knows better than you what is right for you? And who else is going to take care of these needs for you? I keep telling my clients, “Whoever you’re waiting for, be it the wonderful knight in shining armor or the fair princess, he or she is not coming. It’s you and yourself. Make it a good dance.”


Creating Discipline for Self-Transformation

If we don’t discipline ourselves, the world will do it for us.

— William Feather

The third commitment emerges from the first two. The third commitment is a commitment to creating a discipline, a practice, dedicated to clearing out and restructuring our inner programming. This means releasing as much as possible all that does not contribute to our well-being, a true sense of self, and the kind of life we want to live, and instead cultivating new beliefs and energetic and physical habits that support fulfillment. Since we are consciousness/energy beings—consciousness translated into vibrations— when our consciousness shifts, our vibrational patterns shift, and vice versa. Restructuring physical energetic patterns help to shift our consciousness. As a result, what we experience, express, and manifest shifts. The creation of our happiness is our responsibility, and the adventure of transforming limitation into an expansion takes discipline. It’s called the “hard work miracle.”


Living a Life of Contribution

Life, like a mirror, never gives back more than we put into it.

— Anonymous

The fourth commitment is to find what your gifts are and how to make the most out of them. All four commitments are connected and build on each other. We must know ourselves to be able to attend to ourselves through a loving, joyful discipline so that we can contribute to life. Living your life as a contribution inspires the greatest joy. These commitments will be present throughout the rest of the book. They will be expounded upon and further developed.

An Excerpt story from the book Available on Amazon by Nomi Bachar “Gates Of Power- Actualize your true self.” Nomi Bachar is a holistic counselor, coach, self-healing self-actualization expert, and bestselling author. She is also the founder/director of White Cedar Institute, and the creator of the Gates of Power® Method. Gates of Power® is a method and a program to self-heal, transform, reach your highest potential, and fulfill your purpose and goals.


I invite you to treat yourself to a 30-minute FREE consultation. A consultation that would put you on the path to claiming your true self.



bottom of page